Conversation Hearts
Valentine’s Day is not my favorite holiday by any stretch of the imagination.
I never wanted to be the type of person who flaunted my happiness in my relationship as other people suffer or are lonely. I always hated people like that when I was single!
Not to mention the corporate card and flower industries that lurk behind this insidious holiday!
The most interesting thing about Valentine’s Day to me (besides trying to make coherent thoughts from conversation hearts) are the valentines that people make. My personal favorite are these Skyrim ones (as I am obsessed with Skyrim and a huge Elder Scrolls nerd):
http://www.g4tv.com/thefeed/blog/post/720609/skyrim-valentines-day-cards-warm-our-frigid-hearts/
I wish I would have thought of making these brilliant v-day cards!
everything in tens
The storm brewing in your head. Is it any easier to forget?
I think we are all made of contradictions. It’s something that I struggle with.
I think sometimes, when fighting our demons, we can lose part of our identity. Maybe that part is not actually… lost. Maybe she got thrown in jail for ten years for bad behavior. Maybe I hoped that if she would just shut up so that I could have a “normal” life.
Well… it’s time to face the facts. I can’t just work a normal job and have a normal house and normal kids and a normal life and be a normal person and feel fulfilled. It’s not who I am. It’s not what I want. I’ve pretended that this could work for me but it really doesn’t.
I have to create things whether I like it or not. It’s so easy to lie to yourself. But now, I have to be honest.
Because…
Life is arbitrary. It’s random. You or I or someone that you love could die at any moment. I have seen it. I have fucking been there. I am not going to hold my breath and wait for the stars to align. I have to do the best I can to get the most out of every moment. To be the best and most authentic version of myself that I can.
We only have a finite amount of time.
Winter Dreams
Reflecting on the year. Good and bad… Suffering. Estrangement. Loved ones lost. The true friends that stand by your side through the bad times. Looking in the mirror and realizing that you are living a lie. Not knowing why you gave up, and picking yourself back up and trying again. The comfort of love. The lost years waiting. The loss of light… gaining insight. Finding the common threads that connect us all. Feeling lost and knowing that the answer was right there all along… Here’s hoping for a better future.






